Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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