I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
