And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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