I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
