Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
