he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
