Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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