so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize