Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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