Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
