He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
