We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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