at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
