I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
