Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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