Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
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