I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
