There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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