So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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