Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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