Heybabeimwearingurpanties
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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