Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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