Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize