Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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