I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
