i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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