I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
