im gay
i know
yea but for you.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
She needs sedatives and a leash
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
