oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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