What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
