Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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