and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
