I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
