Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
