is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
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