The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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