whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
