So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
