Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
