Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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