She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Randomize
