I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
