i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize