I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
