On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Randomize
