please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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