Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize