Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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