HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
