Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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