Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
